One step back

Never realise that this could be the place for me to rant. Oh gosh, not a very nice place to rant, but yes, I need to. How could everything be normal? It keeps me wondering what is actually going on. No, I'm not talking about politics, I'm talking about something else. It's been almost a month since that fateful night, oh yes, I do mean fateful. Not easy for me to see it on the "bright side" like some would say. I've been trying very hard to see it on the bright side. It's just a wonder, how come others could do it, what am I lacking, what did I do wrong? It might be something like you weren't at fault, it's just that you're right in the middle of this whole damn bad coincidence shit. But then think again, if I could just stand one step back, and let it run, everything might be just alright. It'll be very simple to say for those who said that to me, but actions' not something easy to do when you happened to flashback the happier moments. Happier moments huh? Or should I just say happy moment.

Easy to say than done, "let it go, take a step back", but the ugly fact is that, everytime I take a step back, I take two steps forward. No it doesn't draw me any closer, it just torments me whenever flashback comes into my mind. I really appreciate those moments alot, and it means a world to me. It's just shortlived, and I sincerely want it to go on, it was a chance given to me, but it was snatched away as soon as I took that chance. It was too short for me to prove anything or even showed how much I really care. All these are just mere memories for now. The moment I became myself, you shut me off, how can I ever have that chance to show my true self.

It took me a whole long 3 weeks to finally settle down, but it keeps haunting me on and off. Terrible feelings I would say, but it is just the ugly truth about it. It can be the most beautiful thing in the world, or the worse thing that can happened to a person. To me? I experienced both, and it is not very pleasant. You know you want something, but you can't do anything to achieve that is the worse thing that can happen to anyone. And for those that happen to stumble at my blog, it's not for you, just for me to write down overflowing emotional confusion. Peace =)

It's all about chemistry

These are what I read everyday (or use). How lifeless can it be. . .

My trusty ol' BNF, without it, my lecturers will kill me.

Biochem, something other than PURE chemistry, unfortunately it's still related to chemistry.

Nuff' said, THE BOOK of my first year. I'll be literally sleeping with it this whole year.

Coursework, chemistry stuff that gets my head going gaga (bad gaga, not the party-ing gaga).

And the coursework nightmare continues. . .

4 years of chemistry! Let me see, should I say "Woohoo, I'm studying chemistry only, not like the other courses which requires you to read a-z." or should I say, "Ohmigosh, 4 years of chemistry is like 4 years of geek-ness." Well, it's not that bad I hope, there's entertainment outside my freaking chemistry books.

A moment of emptiness

The emptiness I feel will only keep me going much longer, no matter how long it is, I am determined that I can wait. It's not your fault and never will be, because I'm the one that place myself inside the risk even though I know it is risky. Without risks, we will never get the best out of everything. It will be a hard time for me to take it in as I really appreciate the past. No one can ever replace that, and I am sure of it. It will not be a wasted effort, because I know the time we have together are more than meaningful to me. It is a time where I can find peace in my hectic life.

A moment of emptiness..

Open-minded Malaysia?

We all know the famous NameWee who sang Negarakuku and kawanku, right? If you don't, I should say most of us know him. Anyway, he is back in Malaysia after a long vacation (for some reason-lah) in Taiwan. Apparently the ISA didn't lock him up upon his arrival in Malaysia. Well, like I said, maybe Malaysia is becoming more open-minded than we thought. He is a very influencial person among the Chinese community, locking him up will attract the media like sugar to the ants.

He came back and P1 approached him to make this 1Malaysia-themed short clip to show the misguided teen to open an Islamic bank account. Enjoy.



I will not claim copyright to this video. This video solely belongs to the P1 group. Thanks =)

18 Months Of Enjoyment

It has been 20 months since I started A-levels. I still remember Dr. Wong's threat, "A-levels is the SO-CALLED hardest pre-U course". I definitely agree to that after my AS and A2 exams. Most would ask, what's so hard about A-levels, you can screw around until the finals and study your ass off and get good results. I'll give you a cock stare and let you experience your failure right before your eyes if you do that kind of crap.

It's not as simple as you think it is. However, with some hard work as well as determination, you'll get off with good results. Its worth every sweat and effort you put it. Not only that, I've met many wonderful friends that I'll cherish my entire life. Thanks to them, I had a blast on my 18th birthday. Everything has to come to an end, so does my course (thank god), however my friendship with my friends won't end there of course. I enjoy the times we spend, not cc only, but also dinner, karaoke sessions, birthdays, study time, lepaking time and the list goes on.

I've also learn some mandarin words but I would not say I am able to converse in mandarin though. Good enough to listen easy conversation but not able to reply. That doesn't stop me from learning more from them though, you guys will be my teacher for life, so long as I continue speaking with you guys. I also found out life can suck if I don't make the decision at the right time and also trust the right people, the world is not as simple as I think it is.

Oh well, I guess I found out life is shit when I make wrong decisions but its never too late to make the right ones. Everyday is a lesson to us isn't it? In the near future, I'll make a decision that will change my life dramatically. Hope I'll make the right decision.

Looking forward to life in the UK

Guess speculations with my Nottingham University (Semenyih) entry is not gonna be true after all. Decided to go to the UK to further my studies instead. Initially I thought education in the UK is freaking expensive, but after a brief comparison with education in Australia, I found out that the fees as well as lodging in the UK is far cheaper than the ripped-off Australian universities.

Oh well, I hope that I can get used to the lifestyle in the UK as soon as possible since no one is going to the same university as I am. I have less than 2 months to prepare myself before I leave. So basically, everyday is a day to collect stuff, plan and survey the place I'll be in for the next 4 years. So if you're asking, why 4 years? Most UK courses are 3 years, but I chose MPharm . Well, look at the bright side, 4 years of the UK life and that is a good thing.

8800 Carbon Arte

Imagine what happens when a phone is made from carbon fibre, titanium and stainless steel?
8800 Carbon Arte is the answer, although the features are not exactly great but this phone brings luxury to a whole new level.
This phone costs a staggering RM5000(€1,100 [that's about $1,600]), for your information.